Phases

I've been searching a lot lately. You know... midlife crisis style... as if there were a "one third-life-crisis." I feel as though I've been on the precipice of a major life change for a while, and it's about to hit me square in the face. For those of you who know me, you can probably assume how anxious this has had me. I'm not a "change" gal... In fact, I've made one major change in my life in 31 years.

I went away to college.

I'm still at college.

Okay, I'm not still IN college, but I'm still in the same town, teaching the same classes I took as an undergrad and coaching the same team I was once a part of. I'm going to go ahead and diagnose myself with a fear of change, okay?

It's crazy, one day I can feel so lost and overwhelmed and full of doubt and fear. I could have a lack of motivation or question my abilities my convictions, etc. While the next day, I feel like superwoman, capable of absolutely anything. Do not stand in my way on those days... or better yet, try to... I'll move your ass right out of the way!

"Darling, the moon is still the moon in all of its phases."

This quote was provided to me from the ladies at I AM THAT GIRL. It has since been residing as the background of my phone. When I really dove in to it, the words impacted me more than I could have anticipated.

The moon has many phases. But even when it looks like a sliver in the sky, the whole of the full moon is actually there. It is always, in fact, a full moon... even if it does not appear to be full when one looks to the heavens. 

Similarly, on those days where you and I feel less than, not entirely whole, or lost and confused... our full value, our innate worth, our truest soul is still fully present, even though we may not be able to see it. We exist as a complete being, whether our feelings about ourselves in any given moment are able to comprehend that. We will go through phases of life where we feel like a full, bright moon, and phases when we feel like our moon is barely visible. Both are okay, both are necessary to feel the magnitude of our humanity. 

Because if we didn't know what it felt like to be a crescent moon, we would not understand the greatness of shining our fullness to the world. 

Like the moon, we all have phases. Sometimes we're in a crescent season of life. Other seasons, we bask in the full glow of our passions and potential. They are both important. They both deserve to be embraced. 

So, if you're like me and are struggling to see a glimmer of your tiny moon in the sky, know that seasons change, and you're on the verge of a full moon. If you're basking in the glow of greatness currently, shine that light for everyone to see. 

Allison