Words to live by...

Most of you who know me, or who read my blog frequently know the name Avery. The name of a beloved little girl who went to be with Jesus almost 11 months ago.  A name you may not be familiar with is, Bridget.  Bridget is Avery's mom.  

This morning, I came across these words on Bridget's Facebook status:

"There is so much in this world I need to learn, but this is what I DO know: Life is not a guarantee. You're not promised longevity and you're not promised perfect days for always. Sometimes it's hard. Sometimes it's awful. Sometimes it makes you want to scream and yell and rant and rage. But, honey, it's up to YOU to decide if you want to spend whatever time you have here being angry and ticked off. And it's up to YOU to decide to keep on walking away from that dark place over on towards the fields of light and happiness, no matter how long that trek is gonna take you."

Now, if you know Bridget, you know she is a highly intelligent, uber funny, and amazingly witty person who writes from her heart on a daily basis.  You also know, that she loves so deeply and with so much passion that simply looking at her can make you want to give hugs to every random stranger you meet.  

If you know Bridget, you know that she is ambitious in her goals, and in helping others reach theirs.  It's also evident that she is hell bent on making this world a better place.  

If you know Bridget, you know she has suffered an unbearable loss, and has done everything she can to pick up the pieces of all the broken hearts around her.  

If you know Bridget, you know she is an AMAZING mom.  She leads by example, lets her kids make mistakes and teaches them the importance and the value of knowing that every person was placed on this Earth for a reason.  

If you know Bridget, you know that she is a faithful friend.  She will go above and beyond the call of duty to help someone out, to give a voice to their cause, or to simply offer advice- still working on the chainsaws, B ;-)

If you know Bridget, you know she is strong; Stronger than any person should ever have to be.  She is so strong, in fact, that she was strong for everyone else through her hardest time... and continues to be strong in more ways than I could ever count.  

If you know Bridget, you know that she loves God, that she trusts Him, and allows Him to lead her through this life, that oftentimes makes no sense at all. 

She is the crazy, witty, wild, hilarious, heartfelt, passionate and INSPIRING voice that keeps Avery's heart alive.  --and I am blessed to know her.  

If you know Bridget, you will undoubtably agree with everything I have just written... If you don't know Bridget,

Now you do.  

Love True-

Allison

Mandisa- "Overcomer"

I woke up this morning, started a pot of coffee and turned on "Good Morning America" just like I do every weekday.  It's been a ritual of mine for the better part of two years.  I've decided, there is no better way to get my news, and certainly no better way to start my day.  The news anchors on GMA are incredibly uplifting, even when the topic is hard to discuss.

My favorite anchor is, of course, Miss Robin Roberts.  She is, without a doubt, one of the strongest and most inspiring faces on television.  Her genuine personality and the heart that she has shared with the world is truly remarkable... and the perfect example of the kind of person I want to be.

Robin has had to fight for her life more than once, and she has allowed the nation and the world to be a part of her journey.  Her perseverance and her will to overcome her illnesses are so moving, I can barely find the words to describe her impact on me.

Gospel Singer, Mandisa, just released a new song and music video that features Robin, along with other incredibly inspiring individuals who have truly overcome an obstacle some would say is too big to overcome (among those featured are figure skater Scott Hamilton and US Senator Gabby Giffords).

Since seeing the world premier of the video this morning, I have had the song on repeat.  The words are so relatable, no matter what your circumstances.  As an athlete, there were so many times when I thought I would not be able to go on.

When injuries plagued my body and the pain was so great I couldn't fall asleep at night, or hearing the news that I needed another knee surgery, I needed to hear that I would overcome this.

When the bone in my foot shattered into 4 pieces, I needed to know I would still have a chance.

When I just couldn't stay on the beam, or couldn't make that skill on bars and thought it would never get easier, I needed to know that hard work would persevere.

When my heart was in pieces because I was losing a fight with an eating disorder, I heard the voice that said you are strong enough.

And when we lost our Angel, Avery, and it seemed like the sun would NEVER come out again, He made sure it did.

You see, as Mandisa says so eloquently in her song, "There's nothing He can't do!"

When I was hurting and holding on to the smallest bit of hope that things would work out... they did.  My knee healed, (very well I might add) and I was able to do college gymnastics.  My foot healed, my shoulder healed and I got that second chance I needed to accomplish more of my goals.  Because of this, I was able to stay on as a coach and witness the team I love dearly achieve more dreams and more goals year after year.  If that wasn't the greater plan, I don't know what is.  ;)

During that horribly dark time where I thought I might not get better because I was so sick I couldn't support my body weight (very necessary as a gymnast), He hand selected some of the most wonderful people I have ever met to help me through.  I firmly believe that that support system is the reason I am the person I am.  Robin Roberts says, "Make your Mess, your Message."  --One of the most beautiful statements I have ever heard.  People sometimes wonder why I've been so open about my struggles, and well, it's because I don't want anyone else to go through what I went through.  So my MESS will become my MESSAGE.  To my friends at Team True Beauty... you'll always have me by your side because I am a firm believer in your wonderful mission.

No matter what you may be going through, there is always hope.  Life might knock you down here and there, but He would never hand you something you can't handle.  It might be a test, it might be a road block, but if you simply get up each day and make the most of the situation you're in, you will be an OVERCOMER.

Mandisa- "Overcomer" Video on Good Morning America

Robin Roberts receiving the 2013 ESPY Arthur Ashe Award for Courage

"You're an overcomer
Stay in the fight 'til the final round.
You're not going under
'Cause God is holding you right now.
You might be down for a moment
Feeling like it's hopeless
That's when he reminds you
That you're an overcomer
You're an overcomer."

Love True-
Allison

You Lead, I'll Follow

Recent events in my life have led me to a rather challenging place.  I've been overwhelmed by a few changes in my life, some unbelievably wonderful changes, and some changes I could have lived without.  I feel like I've been on a scale, teetering between being excessively happy about the new opportunities in my life, and incredibly lost regarding other situations.

I know what that sounds like... and you're right, it was awful... for about 2 days.  I spent the better part of 48 hours in limbo, trying to decide my next move.  Because I could have gone either way.  I could have said, "Screw it," and just fallen into misery.  And a couple of years ago... I might have done that.  Hell... 6 months ago, I probably would have done that.  I decided that was not the best option.

Instead I prayed.  I prayed a lot.  

I talked to God and asked him to lead me down the right path.  I prayed for support and understanding, and I pleaded for guidance.  I also thanked Him for all of the gracious things He has done for me, and for bringing some incredibly wonderful people into my life.

You see... I have the best mom in the world.  Don't argue with me.  I'll win any war someone will wage with me.  She is the best... period.  Along with Rhonda's "epic-ness" I have some pretty great friends.  Friends who called to talk when I couldn't string a sentence together.  Friends who texted me to check up, friends who snap chatted a silly face in order to solicit a smile,  or tweeted to encourage my strength.  I had friends who gave advice and friends who just listened.  New friends, and old friends came to my side and through it all I felt Him.  He was handing me these wonderful people who were nothing but supportive and encouraging.

There is a Jamie Grace song that literally changed the way I was looking at my situation.

"You lead, I'll follow, Your hands hold my tomorrow,

Your grip, Your grace, You know the way,

You guide me tenderly,

When you lead, I'll follow,

Just light the way and I'll go,

Cause I know what you got for me is more than I can see,

So lead me on, on, on and on"

These words helped me to realize that it doesn't matter what life throws your way.  God wouldn't hand you something you can't handle.  He wouldn't place me in a situation that he didn't believe me capable of conquering.  He has a plan, and though sometimes it is hard to see, you can't loose faith.  

In my time of wandering, he placed all of the right people in my path.  Those people were there to guide me to this place of content.  I will be okay.  My life is great, and I know that these wonderful opportunities were not meant to be overshadowed.  He is leading... and I will simply relax and follow.

Jamie Grace- "You Lead"

Love True-

Allison

By and By

My oldest friend got married last weekend... in storybook fashion.  Picture this:

A Gazebo on the beach,
Overlooking the beautiful lake,
Mountains in the background
...and a timelessly beautiful bride walking down the aisle towards her Prince Charming.

It was perfect.


In the 23 years that I have known her, I have never seen her as happy as she was that day.  And I couldn't possibly be happier for her.

Kendra and Kyle have been best friends since we were seniors in High School.  To age myself... that is in fact 9 years this fall.  So, for the better part of a decade, these two shared everything.  They loved, they laughed, they fought, they cried, and through it all... they had each other.  No matter what their love endured... it was always going to be Kendra and Kyle.
Kendra was stunning, and the ceremony was almost as beautiful as she was.  It was literally a perfect day on Lake Lure.  The sun never stopped shining, and the wedding guests never stopped dancing (after a few cocktails of course).

It was truly a blessing to witness this magical event.  To see these two high school sweethearts realize their dream of "forever" was beyond amazing.  (Not to mention it was a heck of a weekend vacation) ;-P

It was one of the most intimate and romantic weddings I have ever been to.  The guest list was that of 53 of their closest friends and family members.   This meant that I had 3 of my other best friends at my disposal for 2 full days as well!  The time spent with my high school soul mates is never long enough, yet never wasted.  It's as if the eight years and 5 states spanning 2 time zones has done nothing to diminish our friendship-- and can I just tell you what a blessing that is?!  Kendra and Kyle's wedding song was a beautiful song by Brett Dennen, called "By and By."  There is a line in it... that though it was perfect for Kendra and Kyle, I selfishly take to heart as describing my relationship with these beautiful ladies, "I don't know if I'd survive without a friend like you in my life."

Having spent the last 23 years with Kendra as my friend, and knowing Kyle now for almost 10 years, I know that this is just the beginning of their happiness.  They have both worked so hard to be where they are today, and I am so incredibly proud of both of them!

So I will raise my glass of wine (because all writers toast while they blog), and wish them a long and blissful life together.  May your journey together be a long and incredibly happy one!  I love you both, more than words can say!!!

Love True-
Allison

See You Again

The last three weeks of my life have been both physically and mentally exhausting, completely overwhelming and yet, incredibly rewarding.  I have met some incredible coaches, been reunited with old friends and had the opportunity to coach some wonderful young ladies.  All the while I was missing her.

Her beautiful smile, infectious laugh and witty sense of humor was absent this year.  Her bible wasn't in any of the desk drawers at the dorm, and she wasn't sitting at the foot of my bed during the night that it stormed, talking about nothing... trying to keep her mind off the thunder.

Walking to the gym in Avery's light.

We had our first camp without our God Girl... and it would hit me at the most random moments.  Something a little girl said to me, someone walking into the gym wearing an AveryDay T-shirt, or that little girl who wanted to do cartwheel after cartwheel on the beam until it was perfect.  Those moments were the hardest.  I couldn't take any pictures during the first two weeks.  I kept thinking about the pictures that were taken last year at camp, and how She wasn't going to be in them this year.  It broke my heart.  All these little kids, that had been here last year, laughing with her, tumbling with her, ordering pizza and throwing pie in their coaches' faces...  they got to do it again this year... and She was missing out.

I signed little girl's t-shirts and took pictures for their parents and all the while I had this smile in the back of my mind.  Her smile.  Avery's smile.  It was there the whole time.  In every child that came to camp there was a little bit of Avery's heart.  I saw her in the little girl who was homesick, in the little girl who lost her tooth and got a note from the Whitewater tooth fairy.  She was there with the child who continuously thanked me for the corrections I offered her and in the perfect sunlight that shone as we were walking to the gym one evening.

Feeling her love as I said,"See
you later," to my little Leilani.

Avery didn't miss camp at all.  She was there every second of every day... just in a different way than she had been there in the past.  She helped me get out of bed every morning when I was feeling exhausted and sore, and she helped me console the little girl who got hurt.  She was with the child who threw up in the middle of the night and she comforted me as I said, "see you later" to one of my little GymHawks whose family moved away.



You see, I've resorted to, "see you later" because I refuse to say goodbye to another child.  And I've decided that I'm going to go right ahead and take back the "goodbye" I said to Avery back in October.  Because it's never really, "Goodbye," is it?  I will see her again.  I know that, and I trust that.  I believe that with every fiber of my being.

There's a new Carrie Underwood song that I love... and it makes me think of Avery Johanna and that sparkling smile of hers every time I hear it.  Her beautiful heart is found in every little gymnast I teach, and I will continue to work hard at my faith because she taught me to.  My life has been enriched in every way because of what I have learned from that sweet Angel, and though I missed her dearly at camp this summer, I know she was there with each and every one of us.  She will always be in my heart, "I will carry [her] with me," until I see her again.

Love True,
Allison

Last year at camp.  With our God Girl, before her journey to Heaven.

The last day of camp I took this picture of my girls,
knowing that one special young lady was watching over them.

Carrie Underwood- "See You Again"

Ever After

After a strange injury kept me on the couch for the majority of my day and movies were my only option  to distract me from the pain... I found myself lost in one of the most romantic love stories I have ever discovered.

The movie, Ever After, is a realistic version of the story of Cinderella: a plain servant who, with the help of a fairy god mother, falls in love with the prince, and lives happily ever after.

"How on Earth is Cinderella realistic?" you may ask.  Well, my friends... just remove the fairy god mother and substitute her with Leonardo DaVinci-- and you've got a renaissance rendition of the classic fairy tale.

Okay, maybe REALISTIC isn't the word I am looking for.

Anyway, lying here relishing in the romance that is the story of Danielle and Henry, I got to dreaming about real life fairy tales.  You know, the sappy crap you see in movies.  Don't tell me you haven't daydreamed about it yourself.  That scene where the star crossed lovers that have endured twelve different obstacles and completely lost faith in their love finally reconnect in tear jerking fashion.  Yep.  We all want that.  Trouble is.  Fairy tales are just that-- Fairy Tales.

I think that's why I love this movie so much.  No... Leonardo DaVinci is not going to waltz through my door to the rescue and send me on my way to the man of my dreams.  But it's the way the story is told that gives me hope, and keeps my heart beating enthusiastically.

A woman who struggles with who she is, is sound in her convictions, loyal to those that she loves and tolerant of those who treat her poorly finds someone who finally gives her life meaning.  He rescues her from a life that has been cruel, and she in turn, does the same for him.

The story is told from the perspective of the great-great-granddaughter of Cinderella, who ends the film with a line that struck me to the core:

"And while Cinderella and her Prince did live happily ever after, the point, Gentlemen, is that they lived."

What a beautiful statement about love, happiness and life.  There is no such thing as a perfect love story, and there is so much weight to the idea of measuring your life by how you live it.  Love deeply, smile widely, laugh frequently... and you will live well always.

Love True,

Allison

How Forever Feels

There’s a Kenny Chesney song that has a line in it, “I wanna know how forever feels.”  Though it is a relatively silly song (with a good message), I do, in fact, long to have that life long satisfaction of loving.  Knowing that you have spent the better part of your life with someone who chose you to love unconditionally, someone who could not live their life without you, someone who gives your life incredible depth and meaning.  Oh how wonderful that would be. 

My Grandparents just celebrated their 60^th wedding anniversary this weekend.  It was truly wonderful to see how happy they were.  While attending a special church mass just for them, the priest referred to them as “the wedding couple” which of course, made everyone giddy.  They cut a cake together as they did 60 years ago, surrounded by the product of their love- all of their children and grandchildren. 

When I look at my grandparents, I can only pray that their love radiates down to all of their kids and grandkids.  That their dedication to one another and years spent loving each other (and all of us) is good luck and great karma for the rest of us!  Granted, I know we all make our own luck in life… but perhaps their good example will rub off, because, “I wanna know how forever feels.” J

And though I know that 60 years isn't exactly forever, it can be considered an amazing lifetime!

Congrats on 60 blissful years, Grandma and Grandpa Annala!  All my love~

Love True,

Allison